Weasleys Wizard Wheezes: The Ministry Disapproved Edition (The Liability Remix) [HP; Percy; Gen]

[melle-mal.livejournal.com]

Title: Weasleys Wizard Wheezes: The Ministry Disapproved Edition (The Liability Remix)
Author: sullensiren
Fandom: Harry Potter
Characters: Percy Weasley
Summary: From the Desk of Percival Ignatius Weasley, Concerning the twins' latest product line.
Warnings: None
Spoilers: Through OotP, I suppose.
Rating: PG
Title, Author and URL of Original Story: Weasleys Wizard Wheezes: The Spring 2006 Edition, by xylodemon.
Disclaimer: I don't own them! They belong to Rowling, I was just borrowing them!
Feedback: Yes Please!
Author's Notes: All images, sparkly fonts, and phrasing on the original ads was done by xylodemon. The catalogue itself was all her doing. All I added were Percy's notes. Thanks to tygress for all the help with formatting and graphics! The original story was posted before the publication of Deathly Hallows and the thing that happened therein, so for the sake of comedy, this can be considered AU wherein that thing did not happen.


From the Desk of: Percival Ignatius Weasley
Attn: Fred & George Weasley
Concerning: Weasleys Wizard Wheezes: The Spring 2006 Edition

Fred and George,
This is most certainly NOT my area of expertise, and I didn't have the time to spare to look over all your toys. But since I'm related to you, apparently that means it gets delegated to me, nonetheless. Enclosed you'll find a copy of your latest catalogue and my attached notes. If you would actually read them this time, it might prevent me having to do so in the future!
Regards,
Percy

P.S. Don't bother sending anything by post; I have people checking my mail first. So all you'll do is end up torturing strangers.

P.P.S. And don't try to send it to me at home, either!

---

93 diagon alley

Spring 2006 2 Sickles

Dungbombs


Stinkpellets


Cloth-Eating Powder


Fantastic Fireworks






Canary Cremes


Tonne-Tongue Toffees


Skiving Snackboxes


Kitten Kaboodles


Tortoise Ticklers


Jumbo Java Jolt


Gay For a Day Parfait






Palindrome Portkeys


Instant Holes


Decoy Detonators


Darkness Powder






Rubber Wands


Biting Broomsticks


Instant Lethifold







Pygmy Puffs


Pocket Pooch

to view merchandise in the Adults Only section tap your wand below [I SOLEMNLY SWEAR I AM OF LEGAL AGE]

detach parchment at the dotted line and owl to: Weasleys Wizard Wheezes 93 Diagon Alley

Order Detail Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price: Item Name: Item No.: Qty: Price:

Shipping Information Full Name: Address: Town/City: District: Owl Code: Home Floo: Work Floo:

Payment Information Coins Gringotts Automagic Withdrawal Galleons: Vault Number: Sickles: Contact Goblin: Knuts: Signature:

Comments

[penknife.livejournal.com]

Bwah! Oh, I love this --Percy's voice here is so great.

[lorax]

Thank you! :)

[erinya.livejournal.com]

Hilarious!

[lorax]

Thank you for reading!

[musesfool.livejournal.com]

This is so freaking awesome, I don't even have words.

[lorax]

Heh, I was so relieved you liked it. I was worried that with the text all done in graphics, it would look like I hadn't DONE enough. Thank you so much!

[darkluna.livejournal.com]

This is hysterical! I love how the ink spatters become messier the farther down the list you go. :D

[lorax]

Thank you! Heh, tygress did the graphics part, and I told her I wanted him to be "increasingly frustrated" as he went along, so she added the inkblots and such to show that.

[rynne.livejournal.com]

Oh my God, this is completely and utterly brilliant and ingenious. You are so full of win.

[lorax]

Aww, thank you so much!

[mad-martha.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha! Brilliant!

[lorax]

Thank you!

[melandry.livejournal.com]

Enjoy the internet you just won! Love the LUSH catalog styling and the "Restricted Section" was my favorite item.

[lorax]

Yay! I've always wanted my own shiny Internet. I will love it and hug it and call it Bob.

Thank you! The original catalogue set up was all xylodemon's doing!

[rubynye.livejournal.com]

This is absolutely hysterically hilarious! I love your Percy, even as I wonder once again how he was ever born into that family.

[lorax]

Hee. Every comedy troupe needs a straight man? Thank you so much!

[kindkit.livejournal.com]

*giggles* Poor Percy. And I loved the bit about Cardiff and the man with the blue box!

[lorax]

Hee, I snuck that in on a whim and then decided it was fun to leave it! I'm glad it made you laugh - thank you!

[elanne.livejournal.com]

Hee! Percy's voice is wonderfully done, and I love that he corrects their diction along with critiquing their products. Also, this is such a creative use of remix, providing comments on the original. Great job!

[lorax]

Thank you! I was honestly a little worried that it was TOO liberal a take on remixing, and too much use of the source, but in the end I liked it too much and risked it. I'm glad I did! Thanks again!

[sasha-davidovna.livejournal.com]

This is hilarious!

[lorax]

Thank you!

[snorkackcatcher]

*snicker* Poor Percy -- although he does make some very good points here. :)

[lorax]

He does! His corrections are VERY practical, he insists! Thank you!

[busaikko]

Oh, the curse of trying to be the voice of Reason in the Wisarding World! This is hysterical--poor, rabid Percy.... *g*

[lorax]

It's an impossible job. :) thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it!

[petronelle.livejournal.com]

This is adorable. Oh, Percy. Poor, poor Percy.

[lorax]

Thank you muchly!

[marag.livejournal.com]

OMG, this is fabulous! You've actually made me appreciate Percy's position on things and made me feel sorry for him :) Of all things, for some reason the ink splotches made me laugh the hardest. Just perfect!

[lorax]

Hee, thank you! Don't feel TOO sorry for him. I suspect he enjoys the harping. And the ink splotches were all tygress! I told her I wanted him to look increasingly frustrated as it went on, so she used the ink splotches to reflect that. :) Thank you again!

[inksheddings.livejournal.com]

*dies*

Sheer perfection!

[lorax]

Aww, thank you!

[elsane.livejournal.com]

Hee, this is fabulous!

[lorax]

Thank you very much!

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

Oh, god, this was GREAT! I was cracking up like crazy- poor Percy! Who'd he tick off at the Ministry to deserve such punishment? :)

[lorax]

Hee, I'd imagine he's just easy to delegate to, since they ARE his brothers. And since Percy likes to do what he's told so he'll get patted on the back. Thank you so much!

[roga.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, this is absolutely incredible. Wow. You are made of so much win.

[lorax]

Hee, thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[midnitemaraud-r.livejournal.com]

Ahahahahahah! That was fantastic! So funny, and so Percy! Hee! What a clever and original approach to a remix as well! Nicely done!

[lorax]

Thank you very much!

[reddwarfer.livejournal.com]

Oh dear god, perfect.

[lorax]

Aww, thank you!

[tarie.livejournal.com]

LMAO. Oh, this was a BRILLIANT REMIX. Bravo.

I adored the Doctor Who reference, too! XD

[lorax]

Hah! Icon love.

And thank you very much!

[secretsolitaire.livejournal.com]

*claps* This is hysterical. Poor Percy! I love his penchant for underlining.

[lorax]

Hee, he felt things needed EMPHASIS! Thank you muchly!

[wizefics.livejournal.com]

Let me add to the list of approval. This was hysterical and it made me love Percy just a little bit. *grins*

Dr. Who reference FTW!!!

[lorax]

Hee, I had a lot of fun writing Percy for this, when I hadn't really worked with him at all before. I'm glad you enjoyed it! Thank you!

[teshara.livejournal.com]

hilarious

[lorax]

Thank you!