(Er, your link to the original fic is broken. I managed to track it down (http://asylums.insanejournal.com/wizard_love/3370.html), though. Sorry, I'm one of those people who insists on reading the original first.)
The opening tone (and content) seems initially so divorced from the original that I was a little confused, but it's a striking opening and I really like the look we get at what her world/life has been like, since the original is so focused in Neville's POV.
Wow, the dresses... I love that detail in the original -- of Luna wearing boldly colored dresses to all the funerals -- and you add so much resonance to it with their being her mother's dresses and one of the few things she was able to salvage.
Stand-out lines:
> It’s sari fabric, purchased on her mother’s third expedition to India, carried back to England in a battered leather suitcase, and as Luna winds the slippery cloth around her body the word queen flits into her mind. The word shroud.
> There are spells for re-growing hair, or glamours, but as Luna runs her hands through the short crop she decides she is having none of it; if there’s one thing of which she has proof, it’s that she can do without.
> The grief is something no-one owns and everyone shares in - some have bigger portions than others, but they all have the bitter taste in their mouths.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-05-03 11:59 pm (UTC)The opening tone (and content) seems initially so divorced from the original that I was a little confused, but it's a striking opening and I really like the look we get at what her world/life has been like, since the original is so focused in Neville's POV.
Wow, the dresses... I love that detail in the original -- of Luna wearing boldly colored dresses to all the funerals -- and you add so much resonance to it with their being her mother's dresses and one of the few things she was able to salvage.
Stand-out lines:
> It’s sari fabric, purchased on her mother’s third expedition to India, carried back to England in a battered leather suitcase, and as Luna winds the slippery cloth around her body the word queen flits into her mind. The word shroud.
> There are spells for re-growing hair, or glamours, but as Luna runs her hands through the short crop she decides she is having none of it; if there’s one thing of which she has proof, it’s that she can do without.
> The grief is something no-one owns and everyone shares in - some have bigger portions than others, but they all have the bitter taste in their mouths.