Okay... Wow.
This is beautiful. You have taken this to a completely different level and it's beautiful.

Wow. There are just parts here that are so Luna, they are infused in the story, There was saffron silk for Nymphadora Tonks and Remus Lupin, bright turquoise satin and yards of net for Colin Creevey, crushed red velvet with a matching cap and veil for Severus Snape. This garment is deep purple, almost blue, trimmed in gold. It’s sari fabric, purchased on her mother’s third expedition to India, carried back to England in a battered leather suitcase, and as Luna winds the slippery cloth around her body the word queen flits into her mind. The word shroud.

I loved this, I love how you took tiny parts of my story that I couldn't eleborate on with Neville and turned it into a completely different story. Your Luna is lost and found and just one of the strongest character's I've seen.

George here: He’s perched on his windowsill with Neville Longbottom for company; their legs look ridiculous, dangling in mid-air, George’s long and lanky, Neville’s slightly shorter, their dress shoes jutting out of the ends of their trousers. They’re smoking something, probably a joint, by the pungent smell that wafts lazily across the green lawn. George looks determined and focused, as though he’s never smiled in his life; Neville looks faintly bewildered, as though he can’t quite figure out where he is or what he’s doing there, and that expression deepens every time George passes him the joint between pinched fingers and he takes a smoky sip It's heart breaking but I feel like you've captured the grief here in a way most authors struggle to.

The grief is something no-one owns and everyone shares in - some have bigger portions than others, but they all have the bitter taste in their mouths. Oh yes. Just speechless.

But all of heartache is private, and Luna wonders if Neville knows what she knows, that even Harry, watching Ginny all day from a distance before he met her in the middle of her mother’s roses, is an intruder, a voyeur. They are all of them voyeurs and interlopers and thieves, all of them victims together. I love Luna's description of Ginny/Harry here because this is amazing. I love Luna's ability to see things we can not and especially the beauty of Ginny/Harry here, because I think their pain is challenging. And they're my OTP. Hehe. Luna thinks of the strength evident in Harry’s back as he pressed up against Ginny, the deliberation in his slow thrusts against her. She thinks of Ginny’s leg curved almost delicately around Harry’s waist, her flimsy shoes sliding off to reveal a naked white foot, the most erotic part of the whole tableau. Okay really? This is the most erotic part of the entire piece and I love it because it's not about Luna and I feel like the best part of Luna is because she's not just herself.
“I’ll hold on to you,” she croons into his ear, gasping for air. Neville moans, and his hair (shadowy brown, the colour of the earth he coaxes life from) slips down over his damp forehead; her fingers curl tightly into his expensive shirtsleeves, and she’ll hold him fast, she will. I cried here.

She watches Neville’s lips slide closed around the smoothness of a boiled egg, almost feeling the sensation in her own mouth, the weight of it on her tongue. She remembers with a queer, quick joy the secret delight of marbles when she was younger, six or so, rolling them in her mouth and hearing them clack against her molars, the noise of glass on bone not unlike the ticking of a clock. The dampness of saliva when she spat them back into her palm, fearing that Mother would see and admonish her. Epic.

There are pebbles in the road the muted sea-swept colour of cockle shells, and Luna has all the time in the world to collect them. A beautiful way to end the story.

I know I've practically quoted the entire thing but it's jsut beautiful and I want you to know how wonderful you are to have written this. I'm lucky. You've taken my work and turned into something moving and untangible, thank you.
Thank you very much, I know it's not a gift to me but it's great to know something this beautiful can be inspired by something I created.