(Er, your link to the original fic is broken. I managed to track it down (http://asylums.insanejournal.com/wizard_love/3370.html), though. Sorry, I'm one of those people who insists on reading the original first.)
The opening tone (and content) seems initially so divorced from the original that I was a little confused, but it's a striking opening and I really like the look we get at what her world/life has been like, since the original is so focused in Neville's POV.
Wow, the dresses... I love that detail in the original -- of Luna wearing boldly colored dresses to all the funerals -- and you add so much resonance to it with their being her mother's dresses and one of the few things she was able to salvage.
Stand-out lines:
> It’s sari fabric, purchased on her mother’s third expedition to India, carried back to England in a battered leather suitcase, and as Luna winds the slippery cloth around her body the word queen flits into her mind. The word shroud.
> There are spells for re-growing hair, or glamours, but as Luna runs her hands through the short crop she decides she is having none of it; if there’s one thing of which she has proof, it’s that she can do without.
> The grief is something no-one owns and everyone shares in - some have bigger portions than others, but they all have the bitter taste in their mouths.
no subject
The opening tone (and content) seems initially so divorced from the original that I was a little confused, but it's a striking opening and I really like the look we get at what her world/life has been like, since the original is so focused in Neville's POV.
Wow, the dresses... I love that detail in the original -- of Luna wearing boldly colored dresses to all the funerals -- and you add so much resonance to it with their being her mother's dresses and one of the few things she was able to salvage.
Stand-out lines:
> It’s sari fabric, purchased on her mother’s third expedition to India, carried back to England in a battered leather suitcase, and as Luna winds the slippery cloth around her body the word queen flits into her mind. The word shroud.
> There are spells for re-growing hair, or glamours, but as Luna runs her hands through the short crop she decides she is having none of it; if there’s one thing of which she has proof, it’s that she can do without.
> The grief is something no-one owns and everyone shares in - some have bigger portions than others, but they all have the bitter taste in their mouths.